6-Warning Signs of Relationship Trouble
If you've been wondering if your current relationship is a healthy one, then that in itself is a sign that things are not as they should be. Here are some signs of a relationship that may be unhealthy or need some work.
Too Much Dependence
Even though you and your partner are in a relationship together, you still should be strong individuals in your own rights. You should each be bringing in a positive, independent aspect to your relationship together. It's healthy for each of you to have interests apart from your partner's. You should be spending certain amounts with friends, too. It's fine for you to provide emotional support to each other, but extreme emotional dependence on someone else is never healthy. You can never be someone else's everything.
You Feel Consistently Unhappy
This feeling indicates that you're not getting what you need from your relationship. If you're afraid to approach your partner with your feelings, that's even more of a red flag. Your partner should be willing to meet you halfway. If you can't communicate your unhappiness to your partner, and for reasons for it, then your relationship is lacking in communication. Open communication is absolutely necessary for a healthy, enduring relationship.
You Feel Second-Rate
If you think, or know, that your partner doesn't consider you a priority, then you should probably move along. Feeling cherished and secure within a relationship is something that each partner deserves.
Your Partner Doesn't Support You
Your partner should be like your cheering section, listening to your thoughts and rooting you on. You should never feel like your partner is berating you or making you feel bad about yourself. If you do, that's not healthy.
Your Relationship Lacks Intimacy
Your partner should be your best friend, but they should also be more than that. Couples should share a sexual and emotional connection not found in a platonic friendship. If you're consistently the only one who makes plans for the two of you, or if your partner never seems to seek you out for conversation, then you're not getting the emotional intimacy you're entitled to.
You Feel Like You Can't Be Yourself
If you feel like you have to pretend in order to please your partner, then that's a huge red flag of an unhealthy relationship. While you may have to pretend in front of others at times, you should never feel that your partner doesn't love you for yourself.
These are a few key signs of a relationship in trouble. If you notice one or more of the above in your relationship, it's time for a serious evaluation and personal inventory. You might want to engage in therapy to work on these issues in the relationship, or decide it might be best to move on and try to find a healthy, long-lasting relationship with someone else.
**** Written for Meridian Counseling by: Saba Kerendian, AMFT Registered Associate Marriage and Family Therapist (AMFT 88936)