Tapping Into Spirituality: A Connection With Your Higher Self


Spirituality is something that has been unexplored territory for me, both as a therapist and as a person. However, through some personal life events and powerful emotional experiences, something within me became curious and opened to learning more about our spiritual needs and the impact of spirituality on mental health and well-being. 

There are moments in life that feel so powerful and transformative that they lead you to question if there is some sort of higher "purpose" to our existence. Moments of personal insight that are both painful and beautiful, all at the same time.  

Through a recent journey of change, growth, and transformation in my own life, I have experienced a sense of enlightenment in a way that I could have never imagined.  It's a feeling of hope and passion, for the first time in a long time. A internal sense of peace and trust in the universe.

It's feeling surrender of control, that is both clear and foreign all at the same time. This healing process has opened the doors for reflection about the meaning of life, purpose and a divine connection to our "higher self."

People come into therapy or seek help during times of crisis and fear which stem from inevitable challenges of life. They often come in completely disconnected from themselves and focused on all the external aspects of life such as relationships, jobs, stress, and lack of direction. 

The "shoulds" of life have become the focus of their fears and lead them down a path that feels foreign and un-natural.

Life shouldn't be that way. 

It took a lot of pain and personal reflection to realize that life isn't supposed to be easy- but it also should not feel forced. When you are in true connection with your purpose, things flow naturally and even the difficult things suddenly become less terrifying and instead become opportunities to create deeper meaning in our lives. 

When you stop forcing things and surrender, there is a moment of total clarity and connection with your higher self, in a way you did not even know was possible.

Here are some tips on how to tap into your spiritual side and connect with your "higher self":  

Stop Trying To Control Things: Life will happen. There will be ups and downs and trials, that is inevitable. It's about riding the wave and not trying to force or predict the outcome. It takes a lot of ego strength to surrender control of our lives to the universe- but that's really all that we can do. If you think about it at a deeper level, control is nothing but an illusion that we have created to feel powerful over the unknown. The only thing that you can really control is your reactions and choosing to live life in a way that holds true to your deepest core values. 

My advice is to channel the need to know the future and predict outcomes into understanding yourself at a deeper level. What is your purpose? What type of legacy do you want to leave behind? What type of life do you want to live? Who are the people that you want to surround yourself with? What values are important to you in relationships, work and as a human being? Put that energy into answering those questions for yourself and living in a way that is compatible with the answers you come up with. 

Sit With Yourself: In a world full of distractions and instant pleasure, it's hard to really take a moment and just "be" in our own energy. There is nothing more powerful than being alone with yourself without any distractions. Connecting with one self is an extremely transformational experience and can only be done through self-compassion, curiosity, and acceptance of whatever you find. 

Take a day and just spend time with yourself without any distractions. Go to breakfast, read a book, hike, enjoy a cup of coffee while reading a book, meditate, take a bath, explore your sexuality and take a nap. Nurture yourself and your soul. At the end of the day, the only relationship that lasts a lifetime is the one which you have with yourself. Learn to love yourself from the outside in. 

Notice Your Surroundings: Become aware of the people, places and things around you. Life has a very specific way of sending messages to us. If you slow down and become aware of what is happening around you, things suddenly begin to make sense. It's like a puzzle that you get to put together and suddenly.... "Ahhhaaaahhh" the good, the bad and the ugly all begin to line up. 

If you notice something around you doesn't feel right-change it. When you start putting things into motion the right opportunities and people begin to come into your life. That is the harmony of the universe saying that you are on the right path. 

Know When To Let Go: This is probably the biggest lesson of them all. Learning to let go of something that we love or a future that we envisioned is terrifying and painful. Going into the unknown and not having a plan is scary. Especially when it means realizing that what or who we love, no longer serves us or brings out the best in us. 

Letting go means going through heartbreak. It means denial, bargaining, depression, anger, and acceptance. It means realizing that you can never control another human being or force situations to happen based on our fantasy of the future. Often what we believe to be true exist solely in our fantasy and not in reality. When we let go of someone or something, we are forced to accept our humanity, vulnerability and our mortality. It's the ultimate acceptance of powerlessness, in my opinion. 

Yet, there may be something even more beautiful waiting for us on the other side of that pain. A deeper love that comes from learning to love ourselves and connecting with our souls deepest needs. Learning to love and value yourself at such a deep level that when the right person or opportunity comes up in the future- you trust yourself enough to never question the right decision. It allows you to gain the consciousness that you and YOU alone, are capable of cultivating all that you desire out of life. 

There is nothing more empowering than that. 

Trust Your Intuition: Our intuition is our internal alarm system. It's there to guide us through life. There is nothing that speaks the truth more than what is inside of your soul. Listen to your body, if something feels uneasy or isn't sitting right with you, do not ignore it! Be curious and examine it with intention. Is it natural fear or is it a warning? Only you can know that, but if you choose not to listen to it you may be blindly misleading yourself. 

 Life shouldn't feel manualized and like you are "going through the motions." Life is about being connected, in-tune and alive! If you feel disconnected... You probably are. It may be time to make some big changes and re-evaluate your direction. You don't want to look back on your life and feel like it was not properly lived.

Love, eat, travel, have amazing sex, laugh, take risks, make mistakes, hurt, get back up and experience it all. 

That's really what it's all about.